a room as a metaphor for my relationship

aprilie 5, 2011

it was the warmest sunniest weekend in forever. the cremeries have just opened and people were crowding mont-royal and laurier, the sidewalks and the park benches, exposing themselves to the warmth, cheerfully admitting how hard it had been without. children, dogs, squirrels, groups playing guitar on porches, everybody smiling at everybody (now it’s rainy again, but whatever.)

so on saturday i was laughing around with cynthia a bit, reading her bits of craigslist room postings, and i decided to maybe start answering some. i picked one, the best of the crop, a room in a 6 1/2, with 2 colocs, convenient price-wise…right in villeray, steps away from metro jarry. i was like haha, wouldn’t it be fun if i called. so call i did, and the girl answered to me in french (she doesn’t speak english)…and so i got a date for next day. sunday.

i kept saying how fun it was for me to visit a room in villeray. cynthia shrugged a bit at my silliness, but said it was fine to start seeing rooms anyway (i have almost 3 months til i move…but ok, it’s on my mind). bright sunday noon, and i get off the metro at jarry, sunglasses and lipgloss (my lips are horribly windchapped) and leather jacket armor in place. i cross the street, walking west on jarry st., and i LITERALLY WHINE for a second there (it was a fruiterie…something…we’d grocery-shopped there once), but then it’s fine. the big church with the green roofing. the room i have to see is on st. denis.

the room is ok, a bit bigger than mine, with a window but with less light. giving onto st. denis, which is bad news because of the traffic. access to the balcony!!!, which is actually bad news, because it would be common courtesy to share said balcony. otherwise: even cheaper than the ad said. and i can’t even look at the room properly, because it will come unfurnished, but, surprise – i’m getting excited about possibilities: the chairs and table i could scavenge, the drawer set and matress e. would sell me. the girl looks friendly-pragmatic, the outgoing efficient type (what i dubbed the AEGEE type); the guy is hispanophone (huh, we can try speaking spanish!) and his english is good, and he is a translation student. all of the latter is perhaps very bad news (he is also tall).

but i’m giddy, and jumpy, and once the interview’s over i go across the street and buy a pair of earrings for 2$ just because. then i take a walk on d’s former street 2 blocks away and i generally stroll around the neighbourhood imagining it’s mine. i’ve decided that because it’s so early in the search and i had no expectations i can’t be really sad/disappointed in the eventuality of …rejection. „a negative answer”, the guy said diplomatically. but i’ve decided that in spite of all of that, if they offer me the room, i’ll take it. i’ll go with it.

the guy calls- decent hour of the evening. he says they haven’t decided yet and will have visits all through next week too. blah blah. seriously witty, all i manage to say is „well, just don’t lose my phone number”. but it’s finished, yes? i’ve been dumped. it was a nice day sitting in the sun feeling things were possible and etc. but uh, what a narrow escape. obviously god doesn’t want me to live in villeray :).

 

Reclame

this spring

aprilie 2, 2011

via branch/alex l.: http://www.branchmagazine.com/

‘gardening’, by stephanie bolster:

 

„under the foxgloves, worms. a white/gleam writhes, cut, under the shovel.

what i doubled multiplies down there/below what i thought i made good.”