so i did the facebook note that apparently all the cool kids do right about these days (fyi, sonja) and i am posting it here as a means of keeping this blog going. it is kind of lame.
y’all know what this note is, yes? cause i’m not explaining any damn thing. this is the kind of stuff i would normally do anytime anywhere, would rush to do first thing before morning coffee etc. the reason why i didn’t do it two weeks ago, though i’ve been tagged, partially eludes me…laziness…procrastination…(though i mean THIS IS PROCRASTINATION AT ITS WORST). but look, it does finally serve a purpose: things got so bad now that just by filling it i will feel like i’ve „accomplished something”. hopefully. bear with me:
1) contrary to all appearances, i am an optimist. not naive/idealist (that too, maybe) but optimist.
2)although i am very very very disorganised, and you could kill me with bureaucracy (a number of schools were almost successful with that one), making lists is actually one of my favourite activities. i suppose it’s because it involves (a) writing (b) trying to put A SENSE of order into things and (c) somehow admitting to failure of actions up to this point, since you have to stop and make a list. hm.
3)i sleep with a light on (my mum thinks i’m scared of the dark because being permanently single has left me with some sort of trauma. poor mum.)
4) i have no place i call home, therefore i find it very easy to use the word loosely in connection to hostels, hotels, other ppl’s places, any temporary abode. (like the serial cheater who believes people are too imperfect to be able to achieve a respect-worthy relationship, or smth.)
5)between ages 5 and 10 i had an imaginary (duh) alter-ego (do you even say ‘imaginary alter-ego’?? it’s absurd) who was leading a charmed life in crossover alt. universes, which i’ve recently discovered bear a striking resemblance to fan fiction systems.
6)between 18 and 19 (my first year in cluj) i had a couple of imaginary friends (boy and girl).
7) the number/range of things i would do rather than make a phonecall is unbelievable. try me!
8) it freaks me out to know that i generally make a positive first impression of people; it’s pretty usual for me to try to explain to someone that i’m crazy very soon into our acquaintance (probably means i’m attracted to them!!:))
9)last time i went on a date was 2 ys ago.aaand it was not with someone i even liked.
10)if i was asked who my hero/model in life is, i would pick my grandma, although you can’t begin to realize how incongruous this sounds.
11) if someone else displayed a childish obsession for the ‘american dream’ similar to mine, i would laugh them off SO FAST
12)i don’t think i could fall in love with someone who didn’t (a)speak good english and (b) read literature. i’m not proud of it, just sayin’.
13)i fit my horoscopes alarmingly well, although i don’t really believe in them, i’m always surprised what a typical cancerian i turn out to be.
14) i am slightly ashamed every time i have crushes on good-looking guys.
15)reading is not an interest for me, it’s an addiction. i’m not even sure anymore that i started because i like to read…when it gets so ingrained, it’s hard to see things properly. it’s the same with writing, coffee and political news (yah, pretty much the 4 things i do daily.)
16)i am not sure i comprehend the notions of ‘comfort’ and ‘fun’. but i also have difficulties with ‘duty’ and ‘principle’…worst of both worlds???
17) in canada i have discovered that i am a-sort-of-racist…i.e. as open-minded and nonjudgmental as i try to be (hah, i am very judgmental in fact!) there are prejudices that will take more than 2 ys to go away. some have to do with gender roles etc…this topic would require a way longer note…
18) i don’t believe in improvement of the individual. but because i’m not a good arguer i can let myself bamboozled into agreeing that i do.
19) (see 18) and anytime i agree with you, it may be because i don’t have the skills to prop up my own beliefs, which are the opposite of yours. i am very submissive just so i can remain stubborn.
20)i believe greyhound is the most awesome way to travel. (i’ll refer you back to where i said comfort and fun don’t mean much to me.)
21) i hate starting out with expectations. for example, every time someone’s promised me „great people-watching” opportunities in a new city i wanted to bash their heads in.
22) wow, this goes much faster than i thought it would. I HATE ENDINGS.
23)ooops, almost missed this one: i believe there are a number of women (‘out there’) who could convince me to have sex with them, just because i’m in awe of them. this reflects my general attitude re: sex (which is a pretty sick one), and not at all desire, i don’t think.
24)if i had grown up a male in north america, i would’ve probably been charged with abuse by this time. by which i mean i am physically violent, when i know i can get away with it.
25) i have considered suicide one time in my life, and as i remember i realized real quick that i didn’t truly want to do it.
** hah, i welcome questions. or not? i’m not sure. i would like to hope there are a few new things in here for each of you. i’m squirming a bit. not much.